Oh the Possibilities

Do you want to know how awesome my 'hood is? Yes, notice that I said 'Hood. Well about 45 minutes ago I heard (and felt the vibrations) of about 5 gunshots. Awesome! This is the third time in three months that I have heard something like this. I ignored them on Christmas Eve, because you know how Mexicans get on holidays, when they start drinking...trigger happy. 

I'll be honest. I really like my apartment, I like the space and the geographical location and the fact that really, my area of town is undergoing redevelopment. But I'll also be honest and tell you that a year-and-a-half into my lease I'm pretty worn out. I'm basically paying more than $700 to get shot at, have to tape up my windows so that my head doesn't leak out (and yes, the plastic on my windows is so full of cold air it looks like the dress of one of those fat animated dolls). Last year about this time, my downstairs neighbors had switched my electric meter and were running bills upwards of $500. Even better I didn't catch it until April when my power was cut off for nonpayment 2 weeks in a row. After that they tried to break in. Not to mention that my car was broken into 2 times, in Sept. and December 07 respectively. 

I'd like to say that my landlords are great, and really for the most part, they are. They beefed up security, I have some energy saving appliances, and they installed security cameras on the property. They gave me a break on the rent the first month my electricity shot up and put in an alarm and exhaust fan. Those are all great things, and I feel like I have benefited from them, but I can't help but think that they might not have been done if I hadn't pitched a fit. I mean if you're going to sell yourself as the flippers and the oasis of middle class values then let's make some real changes. Put in energy efficient windows, and newer kitchen appliances. Then maybe charge more than $700, because then I'd at least understand why I'm risking bullets and frigid temps, not to mention that I wouldn't need painters tape and plastic pegged to my walls to keep me warm. 

I wonder though, if I would be this indignant if I didn't have someone who actively worried about me, who wanted me to be safe so that they didn't worry. Would I be writing this or even thinking this if I was not in a relationship, one where I get treated super nicely, where it would be nothing to have them help me break my lease and then we could just play house until we actually set up house? And does it make me insane or crazy or weak or "that girl" for thinking those things? What I'm hoping is that I would feel this way in a relationship or not, and instead of availing myself of my love interest, avail myself of my friends.