Spinning

It's amazing that the first few weeks back to work have turned me into the alpha-male. This is the first night that I've gotten to slow down. No work, no cooking, no chores, no more I have to get this done right now or the world will fall apart. Maybe, just maybe, if I cross my fingers and close my eyes, and click my heels three times, I can get away with it.

To say I don't handle stress well, is sometimes and in some situations an understatement. I don't handle not being perfect (or not seeming perfect and put-together) well. I get short and mean and I'm downright just out for blood. I feel like that's how I've been at home these past few weeks. Tonight, when we're in bed even though it's 8:30 I know I'm so blessed and lucky to have someone and the puppies to come home too. Nice steak dinner, walk and now some reading and t.v., and there is contentment. It's terrible that I've been taking that for granted, that I feel that if I don't stop at some point, I'll just keep on going, full steam, bull-in-a-china-shop, and lose this amazing and wonderful gift.