Being Teacher of the Year Sucks

The first week of school, one of my cousins posted a "God Bless Teachers!" for all the world to see on her Facebook. At the very least if, it wasn't the world, it was all of her friends. As the new school year begins I wonder how many parents express this identical sentiment.

For me, it was touching, in the sense that, while I didn't dread the school year or have my stomach knot up or try to drop ten pounds by not eating, I am down-right tired. This year, I'm actually hopeful. It's not that brand-spanking new teacher, JFK, Peace Corps, I-can-be-the-white Jaime Escalante- kind of hope. No, what I'm carrying is the third year teacher, I didn't royally fuck-up last year kind of hope. I may not reach them all but I can reach one or two. The one thing I didn't want to do this year was lose my patience. My kids get so much yelling and scolding at home, that I want them to really feel like they have a haven and then I can get them to calm down long enough to learn something. The beginning of the year always motivates me. I get up early, stay at school late, walk around the room and do all those things that they say good teachers do. This usually gets robbed by my domineering principal, kids without any type of concern and parents who thing that my job is to corral their rug rats for 8 hours. This is while they sit at home and take care of the other 4 under the age of 10 and if they don't have a job, they're married to some waste-of-life Mexican who thinks that if they un-thether their women somebody else will stick something in 'em. Ergo- welfare, free lunch, the cycle goes on.

That doesn't mean that all Mexicans are lazy or that some folks don't need welfare just to get a leg up and then move on, but what I am saying is that typically this upbringing engenders a kind of hand-out mentality. Why should my child learn to speak and read and write, in whatever language if there is always some government program that will give food to your kids.

So far this year, I have the best class yet. I don't know if this is due to me feeling comfortable in my own skin behind the overhead or if the fact that the kids have been in a more stable Bilingual program has anything to do with it. I do hope with all my heart that I can keep going, no matter how tired I may be or how much I feel that the kids aren't wanting to learn that I can be that haven. Right now, though after a weekend of grading papers and lesson plans and vocabulary lists, I'm just plain tired.